If you play with my hair super gently ill probably fall in love with you
I imagined that you’d miss me, thought
you’d pace your hardwood floor in odd
worn socks, watch the clock sit stuck,
get late to work, type my name caps lock
press and hold shift/break, miss buses, meals
or sit with fork half-way, lost, for minutes,
hours, sleep badly, late, dream chases, shake
send fingers out to pad the pillow, find
my hollow, start awake, roll over, hug a gap,
an ache, take a walk, damp dawn, of course,
wrapped in a mac with the collar up, glimpse
a slice of face, tap a stranger’s back, draw a blank;
as I have. Each time, I run to press your face
to mine, mine, shining with imagined rain.
When it is ruined by judgement
and longing, but the word must sound
like the passage of time."
is a living room wall
with awkwardly placed photographs
hiding fist-shaped holes."
There have been whole years where I have been nothing but mean.
I wanna leave behind my shame, cut all my words from a shiny magazine, sleep like a baby, so someone will hear me when I cry, be nothing but honest, and say nothing but, ‘It hurts, it hurts.’"